She can go back to her husband when we’re done making love, right? The problem comes in when over time an attachment forms between the married woman and her ‘other man.’ Now she is growing used to the arrangement and has convinced herself that the triangle makes her disappointing marriage tolerable.
The target of desire in the relationship is the woman. Her husband is not leaving and she is not letting him go (otherwise she wouldn’t need a triangle to cope). It doesn’t matter how negative wife and husband feel about each other, they are together.The ‘other man’ is probably afraid that he won’t be able to ‘handle’ a love relationship with a fully available woman.He thinks that loving someone else’s woman will save him from this fear of intimacy. In my world that’s an opportunity for growth because triangles are no good for people.He may start thinking about asking her to leave her husband. He could be thrown out of the triangle and the married couple could end up fixing their relationship, this could happen.The ‘other man’ gets painfully left out, not yet knowing that is the best thing that could happen to him.